Kung Fu – “Nine Lives”

by Ted Davis

Original Air Date: February 15, 1973

Directed by: Allen Reisner

This review contains a Kitty Carnage Warning!

Cat Out of the Bag Alert! This review contains spoilers for this episode!

Synopsis: Of American and Chinese parentage, soft spoken Kwai Chang Caine (David Carradine), a Shaolin priest with almost supernatural martial arts skills, has a price on his head because he killed a member of the Chinese royal family (with some justification) and, in order to escape retribution, he roams constantly throughout the late 19th century American West, usually dispensing well-intentioned but hazy philosophy, righting some obvious wrongs, and kicking the stuffings out of a handful of human vermin at least two or three times an episode, all the while espousing a non violent lifestyle. It’s a reasonably satisfying formula, and in this series entry Caine inadvertently causes the death of a treasured mining camp cat, and he and Shawn Mulhare (Albert Salmi), who contributed to the accident, must provide recompense to the angry miners in the form of a replacement cat.

Cat Burglars (Scene Stealers): A low level manual laborer at the camp, Caine frees Boozer the brown tabby cat from a cord securing him to a stout log, not realizing that the feline was temporarily tied to keep him out of harm’s way.

Kung Fu - Nine Lives - brown tabby cat Boozer on tether
Kung Fu - Nine Lives - Caine David Carradine holding brown tabby cat Boozer
Kung Fu - Nine Lives - Caine David Carradine picking up and carrying brown tabby cat Boozer animated gif

Kitty Carnage Warning! Caine sets the cat down in front of a pan filled with milk, but regrettably, at the same instant, Shawn explodes a nearby charge of dynamite and the resulting falling debris kills the cat. (Note: the cat actor is alive as evidenced by their breathing, but it isn’t clear whether or not the cat was drugged for this scene.)

Kung Fu - Nine Lives - Caine David Carradine giving brown tabby cat Boozer some milk in pan
Kung Fu - Nine Lives - brown tabby cat Boozer lying dead

Since the miners regarded Boozer as more than just the camp mascot and a good-luck charm, they ban Shawn from their midst until he can secure a replacement cat of the same size, character, disposition and beer-drinking capacity. Caine is simply banned from the area but accompanies Shawn on his quest to find a feline. In the course of their journey, Caine and Shawn end up at the ranch of the Widow Tackaberry (Geraldine Brooks). Learning the purpose of their quest, she attempts to hide the presence of her orange tabby cat by sticking her inside a carpet bag, but the cat reveals herself on top of the pantry as they sit down at table for an evening meal.

Kung Fu - Nine Lives - ginger tabby cat poking head out of carpet bag
Kung Fu - Nine Lives - ginger tabby cat popping head out of carpet bag as Widow Tackaberry Geraldine Brooks and Shawn Albert Salmi notice animated gif

Shawn is eager to grab the cat then and there, but the widow woman resists, clutching the beloved tabby to her bosom. Caine, naturally and rightly, supports the claim of the widow and her cat. The Widow asks if Shawn would be willing to work for the cat and he agrees.

Kung Fu - Nine Lives - Widow Tackaberry Geraldine Brooks clutching ginger tabby cat
Kung Fu - Nine Lives - Widow Tackaberry Geraldine Brooks clutching ginger tabby cat with Caine David Carradine and Shawn Albert Salmi
Kung Fu - Nine Lives - Widow Tackaberry Geraldine Brooks clutching ginger tabby cat

The cat is next seen peering from the top of a dry well, watching Caine and Shawn labor below, having agreed to dig the shaft in trade for the kitty.

Kung Fu - Nine Lives - ginger tabby cat looking down well
Kung Fu - Nine Lives - ginger tabby cat looking down well

Criminally inclined Henry Skowrin (Royal Dano) and his two thuggish sons Perlee (Merlin Olsen) and Herman (Ross Hagen) invade the ranch looking to steal anything that’s not tied down, and that includes the cat which the Widow Tackaberry is toting, which Skowrin appraises as a fine animal worth at least fifty dollars, cats being a rare commodity in the old Wild West.

Kung Fu - Nine Lives - Widow Tackaberry Geraldine Brooks holding ginger tabby cat with Caine David Carradine

Caine takes the confused cat from the widow and drops her into the well for temporary safekeeping while he deals with the inept but still dangerous Skowrin clan.

Kung Fu - Nine Lives - ginger tabby cat being dropped down well by Caine David Carradine
Kung Fu - Nine Lives - ginger tabby cat being dropped down well by Caine David Carradine animated gif

Once the Skowrins retreat from the ranch, Caine climbs down in the well to retrieve the meowing cat, which he puts in a bucket that Shawn draws up in what must have been a dizzying ascent for the admirably calm animal, since the bucket twirls all the way up to ground level, at which point the tabby is freed.

Kung Fu - Nine Lives - ginger tabby cat being placed in well bucket by Caine David Carradine
Kung Fu - Nine Lives - ginger tabby cat being hauled up in well bucket above Caine David Carradine
Kung Fu - Nine Lives - ginger tabby cat being hauled up in spinning well bucket with Caine David Carradine below animated gif
Kung Fu - Nine Lives - ginger tabby cat in bucket at top of well with Shawn Albert Salmi

At the conclusion of the episode, on a bright sunlit day after all the dangers have passed, the friendly cat bumps the widow and Shawn for pets and scritches as they all lean on a fence, but eventually the cat hops down from the rail, not receiving quite the amount of attention she wanted from the distracted pair.

Kung Fu - Nine Lives - ginger tabby cat on fence with Widow Tackaberry Geraldine Brooks, Caine David Carradine and Shawn Albert Salmi
Kung Fu - Nine Lives - ginger tabby cat on fence with Widow Tackaberry Geraldine Brooks, Caine David Carradine and Shawn Albert Salmi
Kung Fu - Nine Lives - ginger tabby cat on fence wanting pets from Widow Tackaberry Geraldine Brooks and Shawn Albert Salmi with Caine David Carradine animated gif

Final Mewsings: At least Caine had the sense to give Boozer milk instead of beer.

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